What is it that you fear?
Death? Taxes? Mondays?
Hey, I'm not judging your fear! Everyone has the right to be mortally afraid of something. I personally fear losing my memories. This could be because of my maternal grandmother losing her memories to Alzheimer's. I have watched her go from this vibrant woman who knew all the stories and anecdotes to someone who couldn't even remember if she'd brushed her teeth an hour ago. Maybe it's an irrational thing to be worried about, but you see why I'm in no position to judge anyone else's fears right?
I was talking to someone I've known for the last 30 years or so. We weren't close friends or family, but I knew a little bit about her from our limited interactions. She's in her mid 40s', unmarried (a HUGE taboo in India of course!) and she'd worked her whole life to support her siblings. And whenever I met her, she always had a joke ready and I always left chuckling to myself. One day, instead of saying bye and leaving as usual, I just asked her if she'd like to come home for lunch that Friday. If she was surprised at the invitation, she didn't show it. But she accepted the invitation and there she was, having lunch with the family that Friday afternoon.
Before I knew it, it was time for her to leave. She thanked us and as we were saying goodbye she said, "I'm glad you thought of me. I always feel like if I were to disappear, no one would notice. And I'm glad you thought of me".
It just hit me really hard, what she said. I hadn't realised that something so simple as an invitation to lunch could mean something to someone. This got me thinking of what we really fear. Death is imminent of course, and so are taxes and Mondays. But what is it that we really, truly fear? It's the fear of being forgotten! The fact that we're leaving the world and no one would notice our absence or even care, is what truly scares us. The thought of leaving the world without having left a mark on it scares the hell out of us! And I can't blame you, it is scary.
And I realised that if I were to disappear right now, I'd have at least six people who'd wonder where I'd gone off to. And two of them would probably hunt me down and kick my ass for going off without letting them know. And it just made me feel immensely thankful and lucky to have people who'd bother to kick my ass if I were to disappear without letting them know. It also made me incredibly sad that there are people in the world who feel like if they were to disappear, no one would notice.
You just never know when you're making a difference in someone else's life. It could be as simple as smiling at a stranger on the road or buying coffee for that homeless person whom you always see around the street corner. Let someone feel like they matter in the world and that you'd notice if they were to disappear.
Because that's what we all want in the end isn't it? - for someone to care about us.